Sheesh! Two points in response to the beating I took on the last post. First, I didn't mean to insult Ft. Wayne. When I said it had no redeeming qualities I wasn't being completely honest. Second, it was NORTHWEST airlines and not Northwestern Airlines. I guess I was thinking the whole operation was undergraduate in competency.
Now back to Ft. Wayne. I've spent a lot of time in Ft. Wayne. The trip described in my last post was far from my first trip and probably won't be my last. I am willing to admit that Ft. Wayne has two, count'em TWO redeeming qualities. One, it has one of the nicest airports I've ever been in. It has a nice little aviation museum and even a lounge area upstairs where you can hook up your laptop to the internet for free. Don't have a laptop, no problem, they even supply a courtesy computer that you can use. It's also the CLEANEST airport I've ever been in.
The second redeeming quality is the people tend to be polite and friendly. Naive almost beyond the bounds of belief, but polite and friendly. Sophistication is not high on the list of things considered important there. This strikes me as a conscious choice rather than an unintended result.
There's nothing wrong with this. It's differences of opinion that make horse races and different outlooks on life that makes different lifestyles. I like to hit MOMA, FringeNYC and sleep in on Sundays. If I want baseball on the level of the Ft. Wayne Wizards I'll go see the Newark Bears, the Trenton Thunder or the New Jersey Cardinals. But if I want something world class I can go to Yankee Stadium or Shea Stadium. You have to shlep all the way to Indianapolis to see the Colts. I'm 45 minutes from Giants Stadium with the Jets and Giants. Then there are always the Knicks, the Rangers, the Nets and the Devils.
Besides MOMA there is the Museum of Natural History, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Guggenheim and dozens of smaller museums. And that's not to mention Broadway, off-Broadway, the PNC Arts Center, the Newark Center for the Performing Arts, the Metropolitan Opera House, Carnegie Hall and the Jersey Shore. Ok, we also have Atlantic City but we try to forget about that. What do you do for excitement in Ft. Wayne, the Three River Festival? Hell, the Hoboken Street Fair is on that level and the Boardwalk in Wildwood is there all summer.
Then try and find a decent bagel there! We used to carry out bags on the plane from New Jersey when we were heading out by private jet. Not because we wanted them but because the folks from Ft. Wayne who had been to New Jersey asked us to!
If you want to get into crime rates and stuff like that, surprisingly New Jersey and Indiana are about equivalent. In 2004 Indiana was ranked 27th and New Jersey only an eyelash above it at 25th. The murder rate was higher in Indiana than New Jersey. Indiana was ranked 20th and New Jersey 25th. So much for the fiction of the Sopranos. The incident of rape was also higher with Indiana ranked 33rd and New Jersey 50th. New Jersey was much worse in robbery though ranked 12th while Indiana was ranked 25th. I mean what the heck is there worth holding someone up for outside of Indianapolis? A tractor?
Indiana voted for Bush the Unhinged while New Jersey voted for Truth, Justice and the American Way! In Indiana they belive in God and the bible while in New Jersey we believe in equality under the law for all Americans regardless of sexual orientation. That's a left handed way of saying we don't have a problem with Gay Marriage.
New Jersey may be the home of "da Family" but Indiana has the dubious pleasure of being known as the Ku Klux Klan state because it's the only state to have ever elected a Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan to the office of governor!
Ok, ok, I'm getting bored with this. I had a similar tongue-in-cheek e-mail conversation with Professor Doug Linder at the University of Missouri-Kansas City about his position that the East Coast and the West Coast shouldn't treat the Midwest like a vast wasteland. He's right about that of course and I probably shouldn't have said that Ft. Wayne has no redeeming qualities. If nothing else, it's not in the South.
I'm sorry Ft. Wayne! I rather be there than in Philadelphia.
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13 comments:
Tell you what, Skeptic, next time you're in town I'll gladly guide you for an evening to show you where the good stuff's at.
Granted, there are vast acres of mindless, mediocre nonsense here in every market segment, but the culture IS here (sort of), as is the cuisine, the beverages and even some fun.
Drop me an email the next time you're in.
P.S. If you're not flying American Airlines in/out of FWA, you're a fool.
Ya know something...I just think you totally hate Fort Wayne. In some ways I agree (this town tries to be bigger that it really is,) but give me a flipping break!!! (I restrained myself there...) Cry me a damn river! OK so you can't find a BAGEL????? WAH YA CRYBABY!! I don't go around calling your town a "cesspool" or anything like that...judge Fort Wayne when you investigate it deeper, dumbass. You might find there's some things here worth coming back to see. Hell, free cookies at the airport alone seems worth it to me.
I don't know Andy, who are you trying to convince, you or me? Doesn't sound like you're so sure yourself.You're right about American Airlines though. Unfortunately I have to follow company policy and fly who they tell me to fly.
As for you Juan, like I said differences of opinion and the desire for different lifestyles are ok. And hey, bagels are important! The first thing they're going to ask you on judgement day is did you take time out in life to enjoy a good bagel?
I'll refrain from calling you names even though you didn't extend me a similar courtesy. I save name calling for people who are totally undeserving of any respect (like Anne Coulter). I respect you for defending your home town. What was it that led you to believe I deserved to be called names just because I don't agree with you?
But you are right about the free cookies at the airport. I did say that Ft. Wayne had the nicest airport but I forgot to mention the cookies. Glad you reminded me.
I'd beg to differ, Kaduk sounds perfectly convinced of Fort Wayne's virtues. His qualifiers result from the Hoosier/Midwestern tendency to avoid provincialism and arrogance. (One of the least attractive qualities of New Yorkers and other east coasters is precisely your provincialism and arrogance.) We're proud of our city and state, but not blind to its shortcomings, unlike you on the coasts who think "sophistication" starts with bagels and ends with "the Boss".
You demonstrated this tendency again (however unwittingly) by putting down Southerners! As if all that is good in our Union flows like honey out of New York and New Jersey, and all that is mediocre or worse flows from the South and Midwest.
Fah.
Still, despite Midwesterners' awareness of Coastal Condescension, we're *still* polite and hospitable to you. I think that that says something very favorable about us--and not so favorable about you. Oh, but it's probably just naivete, we gullible Hoosiers, we!
Alencon:
"Ich Bin Ein" is right for several reasons. First off, we understand that some portions of our area and populace have, well, some shortcomings (and I do use that particular word very diplomatically). We get that. We've kinda learned to "tune it out," not because we wish to feign some type of ignorance, its just that if we spend too much time worrying about our mediocrity, we lose sight of our goals and "bright spots."
For example, we have literally allowed our city to be suffocated by a mind-numbing deluge of chain restaurants. Everything from McDumpy's to Flat Top Grill. I sincerely feel that this is to the detriment of the city, as Fort Wayne has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that the locals are very creative in their cuisine, vis-a-vis Cork & Cleaver, Club Soda (www.clubsodafortwayne.com), Asakusa (www.asakusajapan.com), The Oyster Bar or even Mad Anthony Brewing Company (www.madbrew.com). An evening in one of these places will (at least temporarily) make you forget the word "bagel."
Here's what it really boils down to: If you know what you're looking for, and know somebody locally (or at least have a decent concierge in your hotel), you can have every bit as good a time in Fort Wayne as most other land-locked metro areas. My work over time has lead me to virtually every major metropolitan area in the United States, most of which I enjoyed immensely (ok, I friggin' HATED Boston...save the Sam Adams brewery). True, most of my favorite destinations were coastal, with Portland, San Francisco and Chicago being at the top of the list. Even after having all of those other places at my disposal for extended periods of time, I can still say that I really do like it here (and it's certainly not because I'm boring or some kind of straw-chewing quilt-making homebody).
Next time you're coming to town, shoot me an email, I'll show you! I'm sure many bloggers here in Fort Wayne and surrounding areas are mortified at the prospect of me being your personal courtesy host, but they'll get over it.
LOL! Very good, very good, I surrender. If Ft. Wayne has such stalwart defenders then there must be value there that in my ignorance, arrogance and provincialism I have overlooked. Although I think “Northeast Centrism” might be a more accurate term than “provincialism.” Arrogance works though.
As far as Boston is concerned, I lived there for a while and I didn’t care for it either. The roads are a suicide run and the Red Sox play there too. And that’s not to mention that Logan may well be the worst airport in the country. I used to shuttle back and forth with some regularity and the place can be an absolute nightmare.
But ich bin what do you mean I “unwittingly” put down southerners? There was nothing unwitting about it. I don’t make it any secret that I have severe problems with a region of the country where 1) a majority of the folks believe creationism and reject evolution, 2) there have been 846 legal murders since 1976 and 3) people keep yapping about “moral values” yet they have the highest murder rate and the highest violent crime rate of any region of the country.
Now Andy, allow me to make an observation about one thing, you said “you can have every bit as good a time in Fort Wayne as most other land-locked metro areas.”
The key words here being “land-locked.” We ain’t land-locked on the coast remember. Have you ever been to the New Jersey shore or Cape Cod or Martha’s Vineyard? Have you ever walked along the Atlantic on a summer night under the stars with your girl on your arm?
I might also point out that I said “It's differences of opinion that make horse races and different outlooks on life that makes different lifestyles” so it’s all subjective. It’s perfectly ok for you guys to like living in Ft. Wayne as long as you don’t ask me to spend any more time there than absolutely necessary.
I was not in a great mood when I posted that, so I apologize for my poor attitude. (It stems from drinking the river water around here.) Fort Wayne does have some good reasons for staying here, though; have ya priced a house here?? Next to Jersey, you could own 2 acres out at Sycamore Hills!!! As for the bagels...well, I'm more of a Dunkin Donuts fan. Homer says it best..."mmmm, donuts..."
And PLEASE, if you're going to bash Ann Coulter send me a warning...I want to see it when it's fresh and smoldering!!! She's dogmeat!!!
And while I'm at it...we are only 2 hours away from the greatest stadium in the world (my opinion): the Indianapolis Motor Speedway. And most other venues are easily accessable: the Cubs and White Sox, the mighty Big Red Machine in Cincinnati (the NL Central champs, my hope;) and KOMET hockey!!! There's more here than meets the eye...
and a McDonald's in every square mile, I think...
As far as Boston is concerned, I lived there for a while and I didn’t care for it either. The roads are a suicide run and the Red Sox play there too.
Yeah, it took me almost two hours to get from the ariport to the other side of the bridge (what is it, 3 miles? 4?), so I ditched the rental car on the side of the road and hailed a cab at the next possible opportunity. The cabbie then proceeded to get in a wreck when I'd been in the car for less than 45 seconds.
Have you ever been to the New Jersey shore or Cape Cod or Martha’s Vineyard?
I've been to Atlantic city. I was a little confused at first though, I was sure that I was driving into a landfill...
Have you ever walked along the Atlantic on a summer night under the stars with your girl on your arm?
Sorry, I would have NEVER taken my girl to A.C. to walk the beach...LOL There were lots of scary looking women with Adam's apples that seemed to be very interested in me. I spent an entire evening trying to avoid one solicitor in particular who I was confident had to be an extra from the "Night of the Living Dead" set...she was very persistent, but its easy to say "no" to a hooker who looks like a corpse.
Oh, and I spent an hour and a half standing in a line for some dumpy sub shop to make sandwiches for half the city. The novelty ran out quickly when I realized they were selling what amounted to Subway sandwiches. I think the place was inappropriately named "White House" or something pristine like that. What a joke.
Anyway, I'd never ask anyone to spend more time here than they have to, but given a chance, I could at least help you find ways to make the time you are required to be here less miserable.
This has been fun. You guys are ok. I promise the next time I'm in Ft. Wayne to stop and smell the roses.
As for Atlantic City, like I said somewhere along the line, we like to forget it's there. It's a real dump. However Atlantic City is not the New Jersey shore. It's more like a wart on the coastline.We like to think of it as the result of God having a bad hair day.
The New Jersey shore extends both north & south of AC. I'm most familiar with the southern portion around Wildwood, Wildwood Crest and Cape May.
Good point about the speedway Juan and the next time I go after Coulter I'm drop you a line.
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